Wednesday

I feel like I have lost my blogging mojo slightly. Recently some people (family members and friends) found out about my blog and while I had never intended to use this blog as a way to bitch about people, I guess I'm a little wary of being judged for what I say. But what the hell! Its my blog and I can say what I want.

I'd just say that if you don't like what I write, just don't read my blog. As that cult kids TV show used to say, Why Don't You Just Switch Off Your Television Set Laptop and Go and Do Something Less Boring Instead?

The last week (its Wednesday) feels like its been going slowly but also has gone fast, if that makes sense, in a blur of being woken up early and being bounced on by kids until we get up, getting kids dressed, getting ready myself, driving to work, being at work (this bit goes slowly), driving home from work, picking the kids up (if husband not doing it), sorting kids out for bed (then putting one or other or both of them back to bed 250 times), evening activities (insert watching TV, doing exercises, putting clothes away or just plain going to bed exhausted) & repeat.

I've been starting to feel like I'm getting a cold. I went out to Wokingham today to go to a health food shop and buy a load of vitamins and oil things. Hoping starting to take these helps me feel a bit better. I have a feeling its just life. I really thought that doing this "detox" (or a variation on it) would make me start to feel a little healthier but if I'm honest, I have mild runs, I've been on a milk period for a week and a half (this came on in the middle of my pill packet), I'm feeling just as tired in the morning as I was before. And now I just can't have my coffee in the morning. Maybe I should just accept that, at this phase in my life (i.e. while the kids are little and I'm working in a far away/non-flexible full-time job), I am just going to be tired all the time. So if I need a couple of coffees during the day or a glass of wine in the evening, why shouldn't I! I'm torn. If all this healthy eating and not drinking IS making me somehow healthier then I don't want to start slipping into old habits. Its not so much the idea of ONE DRINK or ONE LATTE at the weekends, but that one, with me, seems to lead to one every day and then a couple every day. Until I need it to get by. I worry that I'm like my dad in that respect. I don't overdo it very often at all (the occasional night out) but I do find myself relying on things (food, wine, coffee) to "get me through" or make me feel better.