I'm struggling right now. Struggling with commuting. Struggling with not spending time with my kids (and the knowledge that others spend more time with them than I do). Struggling with the complicated childcare arrangements that we have in place and relying on family so as not to bankrupt us. Struggling with a job that doesn't challenge me or even keep me busy. Struggling with the idea of training and bettering myself so that I can work my way to a better job. Worried I won't be able to do it. Worried that people will *know* that I'm no good. Worried about hubby being away, that after 3 days I'll just fall over and end up taking time off work just to catch up on a bit of laundry!!! Worried about being fat (actually truthfully that's the least of my worries right now but it does bug me every morning when I'm trying to decide what to wear). Worried about people seeing me looking like shit (no energy to do makeup and hair this morning and put fairly casual clothes on and then ran into ex-boss and some colleagues from my last company at work). Worried I'm going to regret missing out on my kids littley-years when they're older and that time is gone.
Just don't know how long I can carry on!!!
I'm not going to say "oh, I know exactly how you feel" I'm not going to give you wise words about what helped me when I felt the same way. The most sensible piece of advice I have ever heard was from my Gran. She used to say "As long as your sink's clean and your bed's made, bugger the rest of it!" I think there are a few different ways to interpret that. By the sounds of things you manage to pull off a helluva lot, so to me you're pretty bloody impressive ok? Look at all the positive stuff you do and be proud. And if you feel like you're struggling you yell and I'll listen. And maybe chuck a few Gran-isms your way.
ReplyDeleteKate xx
Just Pirouette and Carry On...
Thanks xxxxx
DeleteSounds like a complete nightmare, I really feel for you. The juggling act of being a parent is hard enough at the best of times but when you're not enjoying the job either, that must be doubly hard :( Is there an alternative? X
ReplyDeleteI don't know. Trying to figure out a way. I do want a career. Just need to find a medium that is not so stressful.
Deletesorry to hear you are struggling at the moment, try to stay positive, never worry about what other people think. I have nominated you in the Liebster Award http://www.onebusymum.com/2013/01/libester-award.html
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. xxxxx Will have a go at it when I have a minute xxx
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